i so hurt now..help me.....

Last night suppose to be fun moment for me, but it was damn suck. I went to my school reunion with my sister. i wore white bubble dress with pink heels and my hair was tied up so nicely till i look like a bride. the dinner was at Kuching Park Hotel, and guess what, it was in the same place where my ex boyfriend brother's wedding. Before that i have asked to god to not let me see him..or her ..however things doesn't came as what i wanted it to be... from a far distance as came out from the car moving forward to the hotel lobby, i saw a figure of guy that i know who he might be, my heart feel so not nice, i told my sister "i think i saw him, there infront of the hotel". I try to walk calm and ignore his existen, however, he recognized me, turning at me twice, but i just move forward. i wish he doesn't not see me at all but most of all i wish i had never see him that night. Since then i can't sit still, my mind keep thinking of him, keep wondering if she there.Im so stupid, i have should not think of him, because he never thought of me, my feeling, all he know is to hurt it again and again. The night became more tragic to me when my sister rushed out from the dinner room to the lift area. I followed her from the back went down to the lobby, my heart start to get really bleeding inside when i saw him bring the girl along. seem like the gal just arrived, and i knew its not planned earlier because the girl came about 9pm...i so sad and down by that time, i just could not let my self see them walking towards the hotel, i keep looking at my phone wondering and trying to make my self calm. But only god knows how i felt inside, how hurt i was that moment. they were happy enjoying, but me, suffering for what they done just to reunite..do u think it is fair?but thats the truth, nothing is fair and square in this world.huhuh....it is not i'm jealous seing them together, but i was hurt because i can't believe him and that girl which i thought was nice one done that to me..mayb its my fault being to sweet and good untill people take me for granted..all i want now is that god send one of his angel to help me to forget about him, heel the pain im having inside and go through all this obstacle.. i can't do it along now..after one, there is another challenge came in my life..most of all i wished not to see him or her, as it will only will make my recovering process more slow...just wanna let them know, i forgive them already, i just want them stop talking bout me, because i myself wanna rest in peace as what i told everyone who us bout him and me..i told them he rest in peace...i have nothing to do with him...huhuhu...god please dont let me see him again.....i don't want to feel sad..i just wanna happy...why isn't everytime i start to stop thinking of him, when my feeling for him vanished, when i did't think that he had ever existed in my life, you make me to start to think and down by letting me seing him,....what are you trying to tell me god....hhuhuu..im so not strong as before now..i weak and becoming the mag that been left on the 30th december 2008...now i have to struggle climbing back alll the steps to get rid the pain and my mind over him...i need help so much now....huhuhu