almost 12 pm...

In few minutes it will be 12 pm, another new day of december. Times are running fast, as fast as the wind blow, as fast as the day turn dark. I seem to be running out of time. Something is uncompleted, something is holding me not to do the past but what i am in now. But im strong enough now to block that. How long will i be strong, only god knows that. I wish i have the power to control everything, to control things that uncontrol. But i am not god, so i don't have that. However i am god's children, his my father, my only father forever. So to him ask, to him i pray for everything i wanted in my life and to him i surrender everything. It is up to him to answer my prayer or even to grant me my wish, when and how, it is all up to him. The only things i can do now, is to wait patiently though along the wait i will be hurt innerly. I have learn a lot from my past. The most greatest thing is i learn to be patient in everything, even it is the hardest moment. Well that is life. Real life will be boring if there is no ups and downs. Patient and hardest of life that actually makes you, me and others different from anyone. The way we cope to this temptation that separating us. Some people is not strong enough and cannot accept the pain of life, as result they commit sucide.

Before the day end and starting with new beginning, today i makes my self darker. Went for swimming with my sis and cousin. It was a fun day just to hang out and share each others life. I tend to forget my probllem for a while. Hopefully tomorrow will be brighter enough for me. I will never give up no matter how hard it will be for me. No matter how harsh things trying to pull my patient down. I will be strong and patient all the time. No matter how bad people gonna treat me, i will never be bad to them. Because i am me. Not them. Loving people and respect people feeling is very important. Hurting people is as equal as hurting my own feeling. By the way, if my girlfriends tend to read this, I miss you guys. And if that someone might read this, I hope i can tell you everything. Good night...