Afterall, there is no use to deny it, there is no use to ignore it. The more you deny the more you ignore the hurt you will feel. Why do you have to hide the feeling? Why do you have to avoid that feeling? Why do you have to prevent that feeling from growing as it wanted to? Why do you have to work so hard to forget it? I asked this to myself. As the result of all of this, i make myself worst. More hurt, more down and makes the heartbroken become no better at all. I wanted so much to heal the pain. Wanted so much to forget everything assuming it never happen. But the fact it has happen and it cant be rid off that easy anymore. It has become a part of my life. Now is time for me to decide what to do with it before i myself getting more hurt.
Each and every moment this think popped out in my mind. Every morning of awake, i haveto tell my self, mag u have to forget everything, ignore everything. Hw long can i stand motivating myself like that when i realized i cant even let my mind off from the things even a second? Thus from that i decided that the best way to do now is to admit and accept everything. Just let the feeling grow as far as it want, prevent it only killing you inside. Let it grow, let it out..thats the best and yes i am happy now when i able to accept that i have that sort of feeling though it is unreachable by me and i dont even know will ever got the chance. So i am now leaving with that option, Facing the real fact and stop avoiding but to accept the real.
All i have now with me is faith. No matter how hard life is, no matter how far things will cause me, no matter how ignorance that person, how hurt it will cause me, i am sure i will ok cause i now believe that god will not put me in the hard time, even it is the worst ever if he didnt know im strong enough to go through it. And i believe this a way god teach me to appretiate life and live a better life later on.
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